SO THERE, WORLD!!!

Can I just say I am so incredibly happy to see that it’s September already! Only twenty-four more days until I hop on a plane to the not-so-sunny, not-so-warm North Dakota to see my very handsome man I never want to live life without ever again.

On another positive note I finished my last first week of college! I have a secret to tell you though. Something you can’t tell any of my fellow class mates or art friends (I love you guys and I'm sure I'll get over myself soon enough). I hate art right now. It’s like the whiney, moody, over emotional friend that complains all the time. I am giving up SO MUCH to get this little piece of paper that says, “Hey you’re officially and adult now, and you supposedly can get a big girl job.” I don’t need this piece of paper. I don't need this last semester. I could be just as successful without this little piece of paper, but there is some little piece of stubborn in me that won’t let me walk away. It won’t let me give up one semester away. It tells me I will live with regret if I walk away and that is the last thing I want. But I am sick of reading pages and pages about what artists are ‘trying to say’. I am tired of professors telling me that I need to think of something completely different and creative so I can be a ‘real’ artist. I want to take amazing photographs that are technically and professionally crafted. I want to make images that make me happy. I don’t care what you think about the art I make. I don’t want anyone’s approval but mine. It makes me kind of mad that I have to waste my time listening to all this when I could be with my husband. When I could be home. It makes me mad that even though it isn’t directly said I hear it loud an clear that I shouldn’t have children because that isn’t what successful women do. I don’t freaking care what you or the world thinks I should do to be successful. I want teeny, squishy, rollie pollie babies! I want a whole house full of them, and I want them before I become professionally successful!! SO THERE, WORLD!!! I want to be a mom. I want to support my husband. I want to allow him to accomplish his goals. So I am here. I am in sunny, warm, Commerce, Texas. I am in my last semester of college. I am here to get my BFA and that’s what I’ll do. 

And her is my recent life in pictures (so what if the only photos I've taken this week were of animals):

So I know I was kind of strong today, but I'm just being honest. I'm happy and I know this will all be worth it. Smile, because I'm pretty sure you just saw a picture of a chicken riding a goat.

Three Two

THIRTY-TWO it's been three two days thats 32 days since the hubs left for his first 'real' job. The first job alined with the career he wants. The job all the way, as far as you can go north, in the United States. The job that is 4:55 hours by plane, 21:35 by car, 117 by bike, and 451 by foot. The job that is too far away. It's the job that provides a future for us. A job that will allow us to have a family. It's the job that allows me to have my dream job, full time Mom. The job that requires more out of him than any other, but the job that is worth it no matter how many sleepless nights he has. Only 45 days until I get to visit him and only 124 days until I move up there. Maybe if I keep saying its 'only' 45 days it will feel shorter? I live for countdowns these days. Countdowns and facetime.

And now the daily (not so daily) Iphone download.

Staying busy around Austin involves showing the exchange students the capital.

It also includes Barton Springs of course.

P.S. The brother is home. And he is now a server at BJs so go get ya some food!

Oh guess what!? I got to go to work with my dad, you know, like you do when your five, and it's summer break, and your baby-sitter isn't available. Except it was kind of different. 

On a semi-positive note (depending on your current stance on selfies) Noah and I have gotten pretty good at selfies. 

My brother likes to keep his room very clean.

Like I said, really good at selfies. Watch out.

Today I would like to leave you with a song that is currently on the top of my list. The video is weirdly awesome.

Thoughts and Recent Happenings

Last month I had a wonderful opportunity to intern with John Derryberry at his portrait studio in Dallas. I couldn't begin to tell you all the many great things that internship taught me but he did pose a question that had me thinking. He told me that if I could answer this question I would be successful and be able to make it in this competitive industry. He asked me why I take pictures. It sounds like a simple question, but it really struck me. Do I know why I take pictures? Is it just a hobby? I couldn't answer the question.

After I finished up at the internship, with the help of my loving mother, we moved all our stuff into my parents garage and took off for a road trip to the western world. (It's weird not having a home. I'm a nomad. Thats kind of cool though.) My parents invited us to go visit my sister, brother, and a whole bunch of other family. Instead of tell you all about the road trip because you might get lost in piles of words I'll share some of my favorite pictures from the trip.... later.

So throughout this trip the question kept roaming around in my mind. Did I just waste the last five years getting a photography degree in something that is just a hobby for me? What is my purpose? Why am I doing this? It was really wearing on me. (I was probably over reacting as usual but thats besides the point.) Then one night I was sitting in a hotel room listening to Stay With Me by Sam Smith and I just started writing my thoughts down. Sometimes that is the only way I can get things straight. Leaving words in my mind is not good because they get cramped and confused,  so I set the words free and I think I discovered why I take pictures.

Do you want to know what those words were that came out of my head and laid themselves down so nicely upon my computer screen? The words that answered the question that was causing me so much grief? Well these are them:

"Imagine a world where the only emotion that exists is love. Every friendship, every relationship, every stranger. The woman in the tie dye shirt stumbling down the street. The man in the baggy shirt holding his dog in one hand. The teenagers causing all that ruckus skateboarding down the street, or the waitress at the bar in the short, blue, dress. Every decision made, every thought that crosses every mind. No jealousy, no bitterness, no insecurities. No fighting, no vengeance, no war. I guess that is why I photograph. I want to connect people. I want to show love. I want to focus on what is good in this world and what this world could be. I want to take a moment to smile and make others smile. I want to take people away from the ugly that is all around. I want carry on my dad’s legacy. I want to show my future children that I believe in this beautiful world we live in. I believe in a place where the only emotion that exists is love." 

So now you too know why I take pictures. Or maybe none of that  made sense and you are wondering why you wasted your time reading that. Ether way here are some pictures and stuff. All taken and edited with my Iphone.

                 

And now, to the few of you who made it this far, you get a Dancing Monkey.